The sidewalk had ended

I cannot remember a time in my life when I didn't know about God. I had been raised going to church on Sunday mornings. I had attended a church-run elementary school. I thought that my relationship with God was as close as every one else's since I was doing all of the things I saw everyone else doing. I was a good person and I tried to keep the commandments.

However, in my late 20s I experienced something that I can only describe as a point in time where I felt that the sidewalk I was on just ended. I couldn't really hear my Heavenly Father, I never had. But, I believed that He was there. I needed answers. I needed strength. I yearned to feel close to Him and loved by Him. And yet, my sidewalk just stopped in a place that still seemed very far away from His presence.

Through prayer and what I now know was personal revelation, I joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. That was July 2001. My children were 5, 3, and 2. Through learning more about my Heavenly Father and my Savior, Jesus Christ, the sidewalk started to expand. I learned to pray in a way that I had never prayed. I developed a love of Jesus Christ that became the motivation for wanting to follow His example. Guilt and fear were no longer the drivers in my life. Love like I had never even considered filled my heart and my life. I came to understand that I was a precious daughter of a Heavenly Father and that He loved me and wanted to help me with every trial, every disappointment, every weakness. I learned about the Holy Ghost and how it could be with me every day as a guide and a protector.

As happy as I have become through learning about and living the gospel, one of the greatest blessings has been raising my children with the gospel. I know that I am a better person, a better parent, a better example because of my knowledge and testimony of Jesus Christ and His teachings.

I have never met a happier person than myself. That might sound odd, I know. But, I know that my happiness comes from living the gospel, not from having everything I could want or from having a perfect life. True joy and happiness cannot be found in the things of this world and I am eternally grateful for this knowledge.

Wherever you are with your relationship with God, I urge you to always strive to be a step closer to your Father in Heaven than you were the day before. Seek Him through prayer. Live the commandments. Read the scriptures. These are the small and simple ways that we can feel of His love and find peace in this world full of distractions and violence.